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Last lecture i was confused...for a change!

I thought this year was going to be the same as last but harder...i think I'm probably stressing myself out a lot more than i actually need to be, being away from uni has helped a lot...i seem to feel much more relaxed at home...away from the smogg of London!

I can't say i fully understand Verbatim theatre and i can't say i think i will like, i like the idea of using the stories, real life stories form the horses moth so to speak, isn't this just a branch off from forum theatre? The stories that Cardboard Citz did for us were peoples true stories...I don't know!

I'll tell you what i do know....i know i want a challenge...i worked with Hannah, Char and Kat plus 3 of the lads last year and really enjoyed the challenge of the work. We went into a school in Sheen and it was a real struggle. The class were extremely unruly, and the teacher came with problems of his own...However we all put in a lot of hard work and extra time with the class and I'm happy to say that it really paid off! I enjoyed every minute of working with the group...i enjoy the psychological side of projects like this and the change of behaviour in this group was out standing...However, i have done that now and want a bigger challenge.

I would love to come back to Leicester and do a project or go to Birmingham and sort something out there but travel is expensive...I'd like to work in a small group and with Creative Colab is at the same time as community theatre work wise and rehearsal wise i can't see myself getting anything properly done as I'd spend days and nights in a car or on a train...also finding a group of people who would actually want to come to Leicester could be hard.

Another thought i had was that my dad works and built up a charity through the police called 'Child Victims of Crime' its pretty much what it says on the tin...both my parents take up to 60 kids and family's to Florida every year...its a huge task and its really beneficial to the group...it means they are surrounded by other people who have suffered the same losses as them just maybe in different ways. One girl a couple of years ago talked for the first time since her mother and sister had been murdered...the charity do such wonders for these children. I don't know if there is something i could do with this???

Its very hard, i don't really want to just go back into a main stream school but after doing some calling round it's very difficult to get placement where i would like to be!?!

Anyone have any ideas...

The Help

I wasn't particularly looking forward to seeing this production, i can't even sum up why?
I enjoyed forum theatre work that we have done in class and had never seen a live piece of theatre performed in this way, so really i should have been more interested in it than i was. However by the end i was completely captivated by how it was used and what settings it could be used in.

I like forum theatre because i feel that it can be used in so many ways to help show lives and stories of people and make a whole audience think. As a society i know how closed off we are, how judgemental and also how two faced we are. I would love to take a piece of theatre like this to some of the places i have travelled and lived and to people in this country who are so narrow minded to what the world outside there little life/world is like.

After the show Terri did a Q&A session i was amazed that people of my age were so closed off to what it's like to be homeless and how surprised they were to find out about homeless people, such as how much a hostel costs.

I felt very privileged to know what i know and to have seen what i have seen i guess i was the narrow minded person thinking at everyone would know. I haven't been homeless but i have lived in places that have no running water and no electricity and no bed and home comforts and though it was hard it was probably when i felt most free...but then reality kicks in of how much we take for granted.

The piece that Card bored Citz performed was very well structured, each characters story was very sad and very hard to take in. I wish we would have been able to look at all the situations as i felt the reason that the majority of people chose Rowena's story was actually because they thought hers was more interesting...if we would have explored the other two i think we could have seen just how deep they were. I actually felt (maybe because i want to work in a therapy area) that Charlies story would have been interesting as i think people would have thought that story was allot easier to get out of than Rowena's...i wondered how many of the audience felt shocked and upset by his story!

After the show a couple of us stayed and went to the SU with the cast...it was fantastic to talk to all the actors about there own story and get feedback from them, Peoples stores interest me so much and i could listen to people all day talk about there experiences and life stories. I like the rawness and find the truth so refreshing. Myself and Bex got talking to Alix, she is a drama therapist and one of the actors in the show. She was really lovely and very helpful she even took my number and told me she was going to put me in touch with someone she knew at Felthem prison who could help with questions and possibly even a placement for community theatre. I thought this was very nice of her, but there has been so many time's when people have promised to help or contact me and never got back in touch (maybe that's more of a hint to me!) But the next morning she called and gave me a number to call...i haven't had the time yet but certainly will be following the call up.

I think one thing that everyone should learn about people in this world is that not everyone has it easy, you can never judge a book by it's cover and your circumstances are not who you are but what helped you become you!

Gosh that was very deep...all in all i loved 'THE HELP' and learnt allot more than what was on the surface of the show!

feeling bad!!!

I feel very bad that i have neglected my duties as a blogger, personally I'm finding this whole process very hard. I normally (as stupid as it sounds) look forward to letting off steam in my portfolio and getting everything down but this feels loose i worry its all wrong?!? I'm scared about giving my opinion in case someone reads more or less into what i am trying to say.

I am enjoying all the work we are doing and AM going to get round to writing about it all at some point. But i feel this blog thingy is not for me!

I enjoy being artistic and creative with my portfolio and i feel like i should be writing much more structured than i am at the moment and wondering how will this all be put together. I know it's not something that i necessarily need to worried about now but i like to know what i have to do and am going to do...I'm a very organised person.

This blog is turning into a self help clinic for me!!

Confused!!!!

Help!!!
I have been sat researching ideas for about an hour now, I'm so frustrated as i really have no idea what i want to do....this is more upsetting because this is hopefully going to the type of work i want to do in the future.
Why am i having a thought block and creative disaster????

I think i am going to dare to work on my own...but every time i come up with an idea of the area i want to go with i get this block on what type of work to do with them, what they would enjoy and then start doubting that i can infact do this at all...i think i need some inspiration!

Starting a blog

At first i was happy about writing a blog, i did one when i was travelling and really enjoyed it, However after spending the last 10 minutes trying to find a name for this thing i am now quite board with the whole thing!!!

Anyway i enjoyed today's lecture and am in two minds of what i want to do...Doing a group project could be fun...but will anyone listen to my ideas and will everybody have as much involvement as they would like?????